Denver Hash House Harriers

January 31, 2011

DENH3

Filed under: Uncategorized — mgw @ 11:43 pm

 

We Set The Standard For Bad Behavior

NEXT HASH

July 27th

Just Connie & Snowball

 

Cum 1 Cum all. Just Connie ain’t even named yet and she is haring here first trail!! She begged Snowball to assist so it promises to be a truly Sh*tty trail!

When you ask? Sunday, Sunday, Sunday! July 27. Yep this cumming Sunday at 1400 (2:00 PM for you civilians) Get there early for better parking and possible pre-lube action.

Where you say? James Bible Park in Denver (Yale between Quebec and Monaco) Google that shit!

What’s it gonna cost? 5 clams. Cinco Dollares. 5 Bones. Half a ten spot.

What should I Bring? Virgins. Dry shoes (cuz you will get wet). Shag bag cuz its A-B. Skeeter repellant (Cuz those bloodsuckers are out in force). A thirst for shitty beer. Whiskey – Irish, Scottish or good old Corn whiskey. Hash Kilts (Cuz all of the cool kids are doing it). More Virgins!

Can I bring my Bitch? Trail and circle are Pooch friendly, but the On On On is not and the parking lot will get warm.

Length? About 8 inches…

 

Oh yeah, there might be jello…

 

 

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ON DECK

KILTED HASH

 

WHAT: Kilted Hash

WHEN:August 9th, 2:00

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“Intelligent people call it a kilt.”

WHERE: Belleview Elementary School near Belleview & Dayton in Greenwood Village. Here’s the map

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PRE-LUBE: Baker’s Street, 1:00, 8101 E Belleview Ave, Denver, CO

HASH WEDDING: Yes there will be a Hash Wedding before chalk talk. Who’s getting married? You will have to be there to find out.

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TRAIL:A-B, Kilt Inspection Checks, Beer Quest Check, There is a good chance of light to insane shiggy, Beer Checks and a good chance of wet shoes.

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HASH CASH: $5

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HARE: Ass Whisperer

indexkiltshoot834b596ec2e68052737bf67bebc2556c“What’s worn under your kilt? Nothing is worn, it’s all in perfect working condition.” 6500

HARRIETTES, there will be an abundance of kilts and we will need a lot of qualified kilt inspectors to make sure everything is regimental.

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BRING: A Kilt, A Leaf Blower, Cash, A Lack of Shyness and Modesty, Whistle, A Moist Towelette, New Shoes, Dry Clothes, Shag Bag

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ON-AFTER: The Tilted Kilt, 8000 E Belleview Ave, Greenwood Village, CO 80111

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BOW WOWS: Doggies must be on a leash at all times including beer check and circle. Don’t bring unwanted attention to our gathering such as having the authorities pay us a visit because you didn’t keep your pooch restrained. Be mindful they have cold wet noses and we will be wearing kilts. This could justify retaliation against the caretaker of said puppy.

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Pants are Evil

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FAQ’s

Q: Will there be a human sacrifice?

A: Yes

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Q: Do I have to wear a kilt?

A: If you don’t wear a kilt, Speedbump will tongue kiss you.

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Q: Speedbump never adheres to any theme, what happens if he doesn’t wear a kilt?

A: I think it’s called a daisy chain.

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Q: What if I don’t own a kilt?

A: This means your wife doesn’t love you. Sorry to be the one to break it to you.

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Q: Is Nanny Pokely going to be there because she gets all grabby around kilts?

A: You know she will and I will be first in line.

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Q: Squirls?

A: Just keep moving, there’s nothing to see here.

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Q: Will Buckman wear a kilt this year?

A: If there is any chance of squirrels, he just won’t take the risk. You can’t blame him ever since “the incident.”

 

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Just say no to pants

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Other Hash Info

If you are looking for all the Colorado Hashes check out the Colorado Hash Facebook Page. Want to know when we are drinking and running? Check out the Hare Schedule or the Denver Hash Facebook Page. Want to be on the EMAIL DISTRIBUTION? Click here For all you kids, we’re on the Twitter DENH3.

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